5 reasons people find their way to career coaching
People are fascinated by my work.
It doesn't seem to matter where I am. At a barbecue, on the sidelines of a kids' soccer match, over coffee with a friend, or sitting next to someone on a plane, people inevitably ask what I do. Before long, the questions start coming.
"What does a career coach actually do?"
"Who comes to see you?"
"Why would someone work with a career coach?"
The truth is, no two people arrive with exactly the same story. Every set of circumstances is different. Every career is different. Every life is different.
Yes, I absolutely notice themes that emerge over time. But my work is deeply human. It isn't about putting people into neat categories. It's about meeting each person where they are, understanding what's brought them to this point, and helping them work out what comes next.
After five years and well over a thousand career conversations, there are some common reasons that come up again and again.
Here are the five I see most often.
1️⃣ Many of the people I work with are still living out decisions they made before they really knew themselves.
People don't all leave school with a clear sense of what they're meant to do next, or even what they're actually good at yet. For a lot of people I work with, that stage of life wasn't really about exploration. It was about getting through, keeping up, or meeting expectations.
School can be pressured, uneven, or just something you survive rather than something that helps you properly understand yourself. Some people move through it feeling like they've got a clear direction, but plenty don't.
Some had families with strong ideas about what 'success' should look like. Others were trying to find their footing socially or emotionally at the same time, so career decisions were never really the focus. And for some, it was just a case of not quite landing on anything that felt like 'them'.
By the time school ends, a lot of people haven't found their thing. Not because they're lacking or unmotivated, but because they were never really given the space, support, or language to explore it properly in the first place.
And in many cases, the guidance that did exist simply didn't reflect the modern world of work anyway. It was often narrow, outdated, or focused on a version of careers that doesn't really exist anymore.
What I come back to often with clients is this. Early decisions make complete sense in context, but they don't have to define everything that comes after.
I know this one personally as well. My own path into law was shaped early by expectation and a bit of gentle pressure. I followed it through law at A level, university, law school and qualifying, before quite quickly realising it wasn't mine. That experience is a big part of why I do this work now.
If you pause and think back to your own early choices, do they still feel like yours today, or just something you've kept walking?
2️⃣ What worked well in your twenties doesn't always fit the same way in your thirties and beyond.
In your twenties, there's often more energy for pace, more tolerance for risk, and a stronger focus on progression, proving yourself, and getting ahead. For a lot of people, that stage of life is fast-moving and relatively contained, with fewer competing demands outside of work.
But as life shifts, especially into your thirties and beyond, those drivers can start to change. What once felt motivating can start to feel harder to sustain, not because the ambition has disappeared, but because the context around it has changed.
Increasingly, I'm also working with people in their late twenties and early thirties who are thinking much more strategically about this. They're actively trying to get clarity on their career before starting a family, or making decisions about workplaces that will actually support the life they want later on.
There's a growing awareness of the importance of finding family-friendly workplaces early, rather than trying to retrofit life around a role that was never designed with flexibility in mind.
From my own experience, I know this matters. My previous corporate life wouldn't have allowed me to be the kind of present mum I want to be. Things like school drop-offs, pick-ups, being part of the school community, and showing up for the small everyday moments are really important to me.
What I see time and time again in my work is that this becomes a turning point. Some people realise before starting a family that their current career won't be compatible with the life they want. Others only see it once they're in it, when the reality of the juggle becomes very real, very quickly.
Trying to hold both sides can feel incredibly difficult. When you're at work, part of you is thinking about home. When you're at home, work is still landing in your inbox. Even when things are technically part-time or flexible, the boundaries don't always hold in the way you hoped they would.
Career decisions are never separate from life decisions. They're deeply connected to them, whether we plan for that or not.
When you think about the version of work you once signed up for, does it still fit the life you're living now?
3️⃣ Sometimes the reason people find their way to career coaching is because something has happened that makes it difficult, or no longer possible, to keep going in the same way.
This isn't always a gradual shift. Sometimes it's an interruption. Something that lands in life and changes what feels sustainable from that point onwards.
For some people, that might be a relationship breakdown or bereavement, where everything else in life has to be reassembled around a very different emotional reality.
For others, it might be something that happens in work itself. Burnout, bullying, harassment, or a toxic environment that leaves a lasting imprint. Even when you leave the job, you don't necessarily leave the experience behind.
And sometimes it's a health crisis, or a major life event, where the way you were working before is simply no longer an option in the same form.
What I notice in these situations is that people don't just feel like they've had to change direction. They often feel like something has shifted in them. Not broken, but different. More cautious. More aware. Sometimes more depleted than they were before.
And so the question stops being, 'What do I want next?' and becomes something closer to, 'What am I actually able to carry now?'
What I see time and time again in this work is that these moments often force a level of honesty people haven't had with themselves before. Not because they weren't self-aware, but because life was previously moving too quickly to stop and fully take stock.
When something in your life has shifted in a way you didn't choose, how has it changed what you now feel able to do day to day?
4️⃣ Somewhere around midlife, a lot of people realise they've still got another 10, 15, maybe even 20 years of work ahead of them, and they start asking themselves different questions.
One thing I've noticed over the years is just how many people contact me around the time they've turned 50, or are about to. Interestingly, they're not always deeply unhappy. Some are. Others are simply ready for something different.
For many parents, this also coincides with another shift. Their children are older, more independent, and don't need them in quite the same way they once did. Sometimes the mortgage feels a little less daunting. There may be more financial breathing room, or simply more capacity to return to study, retrain, or pursue something they've quietly wondered about for years.
The conversation changes at this point too. It becomes less about climbing the next rung of the ladder and more about satisfaction, fulfilment, impact, and making the years ahead feel meaningful.
I'm about to turn 46, so I'm not quite there yet, and I'm certainly not planning a career change. I also don't spend much time regretting past decisions because every one of them has shaped the life and business I have today. But if I could choose again, I probably would've studied psychology instead of law. Not because I wish I'd lived a different life, but because I know myself better now than I did at 18.
Maybe that's the real gift of this stage of life. You stop asking, 'What should I do?' and start asking, 'Knowing what I know now, what do I want the next chapter to look like?'
If you've still got another 10, 15, or even 20 years of work ahead of you, what do you want those years to feel like?
5️⃣ Sometimes the biggest career turning point isn't caused by a crisis. It's caused by an awakening.
This one can happen at almost any age or stage of life. Sometimes it's an epiphany. A growing awareness that the work you've been doing no longer feels fully aligned with the person you've become.
In a world that often feels uncertain and heavy, I'm noticing more and more people searching for something deeper. They're reconnecting with their values, thinking about purpose, questioning what really matters, and wanting their work to make a genuine difference. They're looking for meaning, not just momentum.
I relate to this one very deeply. Work has always needed to mean something to me. I've found it incredibly difficult to stay in environments where my values didn't align or where I couldn't see the impact I was having. For me, meaningful work has never been a nice-to-have. It's been essential.
That's one of the reasons I love career coaching so much. Every conversation starts with a career question, but it rarely stays there. Before long, we're exploring values, identity, confidence, relationships, family, wellbeing, purpose, and all the parts of life that shape how work feels. It's why the philosophy behind Small Circle has always been 'It's All Connected.'
Perhaps that's what these moments of awakening really offer us. Not a completely different life, but the opportunity to build one that feels more aligned with who we are today than the person we were when we first chose our path.
Have you had one of those quiet moments of enlightenment where you've realised you're no longer looking for a better job, but a more meaningful way to spend your working life?
If you recognised yourself in one of these stories, or perhaps in several of them, you're certainly not alone.
One of the things I've learnt through this work is that career decisions are rarely just about careers. They're connected to our relationships, our health, our confidence, our families, our values, our identity, and the season of life we're in. It's exactly why the philosophy behind Small Circle has always been 'It's All Connected.'
If something you've read today has sparked something in you, I'd love to invite you to book a free 30-minute Connection Call.
It's simply a safe space to zoom out, talk honestly about what's working, what isn't, and explore whether career coaching might be the right next step for you.