5 reasons the right job is more important than ever when you become a mum.
5 reasons the right job is more important than ever when you become a mum.
After having children, like many women, I found my feelings towards work had changed. Although my values remained steadfast, my priorities shifted exponentially.
Many women are completely unprepared for just how much their feelings about work change. As the high demands of motherhood consume more of your energy, you might choose to re-evaluate your career options. Your career remains an important (oh, so important) part of who you are, but plans for career advancement may slow or grind to a halt for a short while.
1 - You need a decent workplace which respects and honours its peoples’ whole selves
That first winter in daycare? Oh boy. I’ve been there (x2). I know what it feels like having to message your boss AGAIN to say the little one is home sick with gastro/hand foot and mouth/croup/conjunctivitis/other infectious disease. I also remember feeling that because my workplace had accommodated their relentless and unending bouts of illness with good grace, I had somehow have waived the right to set firm boundaries and push back, or ask for anything more than my basic remuneration. When you return to work, make sure you are working somewhere that actively encourages you to take care of yourself and little ones, without making you feel you are less than the committed and hardworking professional I know you are.
2 - Not everyone who was in a leadership role will want to lead a team after having kids
It takes time, energy and investment to be a great leader. Some new mums are eager to jump back into the senior roles they left behind for maternity leave. Motherhood gives them a new level of confidence and amplifies their skills of precision focus and high output. Work for mums who fall into this category is a healthy diversion from home life that they crave. Returning to a high level role within a team offers the opportunity to continue to deliver work at a senior level and maintain core relationships with the Executive and leadership teams. This type of highly motivated and career focused mum also tends to enjoy and thrives on being a mentor or support person to more junior colleagues, without the burden of knowing the buck stops with them.
For others, moving into a project delivery role with zero people responsibility can be the right call. The pressures associated with high level roles are not for everyone and that’s perfectly ok. Motherhood can change everything. Personally, I’m someone who found the return to a senior role, post children, no longer fit my value set. Not only did my energy levels change, but my drive and ambition took a detour. During those early years of motherhood I didn’t have the mental or emotional energy to focus on growing my direct reports and I wasn’t able to show up for them in the way they deserved. Notice the word detour. My drive and ambition didn’t stop, it just changed. I needed a new path and my purpose was now different.
What do you have the capacity for and how much of yourself do you want to give?
3 - Work becomes an opportunity for social connection
For mums who haven’t got the time or energy for socialising on top of work and family life, work becomes an opportunity for social connection. You might not always be able to make those after-work drinks, but try to do the coffees and lunches and find like-minded colleagues to take a break with. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of working through lunch, particularly if you are part-time or working flexible hours, because you feel you must prove how hard you are working and how committed to your job you are.
4 - Part-time work doesn’t diminish your desire to learn and grow
Most women either return, or wish they could return, in a reduced capacity straight after maternity leave. This doesn’t mean your desire to learn and develop diminishes in anyway, nor should you have to compromise on access to opportunities to grow. However, many women find it difficult asking for more than their basic remuneration when working part-time or flexibly. For some reason, they feel less entitled to ask for professional development. Find an employer who treats you equally and plays fair when it comes to investing in your PD. Regardless of whether you are working part-time or flexibly, you should be able to access budget and time in order to continue your learning and development.
5 - Your values become more important than ever
Not only are you hardwired to want to be a great role model to your kids, you also have a burning desire to make the world a better place for them to step into. Things you might have turned a blind eye to before having kids, now seem intolerable. If you were miserable at work prior to becoming a mum, or your values weren’t aligned with your workplace, I bet you’re feeling it twice as hard to bear - post-babies….